Letting Go of Home

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

For years I dreamed of travelling this fabulous continent with only a camper van and my best friend, (and hubby in case you are new to the blog) Q.  I was heavy into my career, building, growing, climbing that corporate ladder but as I sat in my office staring out the windows I would dream of being somewhere else.  I felt stifled, uninspired in my life.  I was successful but I felt empty inside like something was missing.

Snippets of the life I truly wanted were granted to me via holidays and vacations but once I returned to my life of commute, home, commute, I would quickly push those memories away so I wouldn’t be reminded I wasn’t where I was supposed to be.  With obligations growing I worked on, adding responsibilities to my job and knick knacks to my house.  Over time I would forget the feelings the vacations would illicit and be complacent with my mediocre existence as long as my house was beautiful, my children provided for and Q and I were at some sort of happy medium.  But when you exist, not live, but merely exist, regardless of how nice your surroundings may be, there is a coldness in your soul that begs you to find the warmth it desires.

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

 

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

Q and I have often said we were lucky to finally get the message to re-evaluate our lives, albeit came in the form of an illness.  But the truth is, would we have ever stopped, reassessed and taken action if the message hadn’t been so threatening?  After much consideration, we think not.  We are grateful our eyes were opened, and for the first time since we could remember, we could truly, purely see.

To choose to begin a nomadic lifestyle like I had always dreamed of was an easy decision.  The hard part came in letting go of our home.  Your home isn’t just “where you lay your hat”.  For the majority of us, a home has an address, a static view, with only neighbours changing occasionally.    Home is an anchor, keeping us from being drifters.

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

For Q and I, we had spent our working careers building our home, designing it into our own masterpiece that felt warm, comforting and happy.  It was the ambience we had chosen via our furniture, art and colour schemes.  Home, was where we placed the majority of our pay cheque, maintaining, and renovating.

When we had finally committed to this nomadic lifestyle it took me months to let go of my home.  I would wander into each room and pour my gaze over every inch from ceiling to floor.  I would reminisce about where I purchased that lamp, how did I come by that chair and I would ask in every room – how do I let go?  Our home is what had comforted me in the darkest days of my life, and contained some of my greatest joys.

My family had lived within these walls.

In every candlestick, throw pillow and mirror, there was a story and sacrifice made.  Fear welled within.  What if I could never replace my home – in the state in which I now owned it, filled with all the things I’ve ever wanted?

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

During our discussions of our fears of letting go of home something shifted in my thinking when Q finally relented and told me I could keep whatever I wanted.  We’d put it in storage until when and if we decided to finally be anchored to one street ever again.  The exercise of deciding what to keep had me gauge the value of each item.  I noted during this process each item independently held limited value in terms of sentiment.  It was collectively where these items’ greatest worth was noted but by themselves, they were just things we had purchased for no other reason than we liked the way it looked.

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

For the first time, I started to see my home objectively and realized the attachment I felt wasn’t to the frames that lined the shelves or the duvet that covered my bed.  The walls equated to nothing more than a house, and our belongings were just that.  Things that belonged to us.  I was bound to the parties we held for our family.  The Christmas get togethers, baby showers and birthdays.  I was held by the memories and the love that encompassed us.  The things that made it a home, wouldn’t be left behind or sold.  It was each and every one of us, our love for each other and the memories we had made that made this address our home.  And as long as we were all together, my home would always be with me, where ever I may be.  I was finally able to shift the value from items and place it where it belonged, on ourselves and the new experiences we would now have and the love and joy we will continue to share.  Home may not necessarily be where you lay your hat, but it definitely is where your heart is.

Too often in our culture, we place the utmost importance on things.  And like others, we too subscribed to this belief, but not anymore.  Time is more valuable than anything.  With time, we get to live, not exist.  And realizing our time would now be spent living, loving and laughing exactly how our heart and soul desires, we have no need or capacity for “stuff”.

full-time rv living, rv travel, rving

I won’t lie.  When we eventually walk out the front door the very last time it will be bittersweet.  I have loved the home we made for ourselves within these walls.  I will miss the warmth of the home we created within these walls.  But I will smile knowing, I will be taking what I love most about my home with me when I leave.

~ True North Nomad

Have you had to let go of something you love to fulfil a dream?  Tell us in the comments below.

Country road, take me home, to the place I belong – enter your email address top left, bottom right or bottom centre of this post and click “Follow” and never miss an impassioned tale again!

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280 responses to “Letting Go of Home

  1. Well your home is beautiful, but I think what you are planning to do is even more beautiful. I agree with the concept that memories are more valuable than stuff. If you ever do decide to return to “normal life” and you find that it takes you a while to get back to this, so be it. At least you know you will never be bored or run out of things to do. Go for it! I think it’s awesome. Please post often about your travels!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh normal life… I’m almost missing it right now its been so crazy!!!! Oh well, you can’t make big changes and not expect some bumps along the way. Thank you for dropping by and I do hope you stay for the adventure!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I went through exactly the same thing when we decided to sell all of our belongings and our home and businesses and hit the road. Leaving our home for the last time was very hard for me. I could hear the kids laughter, see the christmas trees, remember our tenderest moments, our laughter and our tears. I loved our historic home, the neighborhood etc. and as I walked out and away from all of it I felt a deep sadness. I know now, and realized very soon afterwards that all of those memories, and our home stays with me in my soul, it helped shape me and will forever be a part of me and my family. We have been “homeless” for over a year now, exploring, volunteering etc and it has given me more than the possessions and walls of my home ever did. It has taught the children in our family lessons I could never have dreamed of in our home. Now I can’t imagine a life full of all of that stuff.
    Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Being that we’re still in the thick of it all, we haven’t felt like we’re living the dream yet, kind of like a nightmare right now, but glad to hear that when it finally settles things will look brighter. Thank you for visiting!

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  3. This is a very challenging tale, sometimes we think when we change our environment due to some certain reasons things may not be the same.. I am a witness to that but as time went on I got to realize that the things we place much importance on doesn’t really matter what matters is how we see those things and how we can learn to adapt to our new environment. God bless you

    Liked by 4 people

    • Thank you so much. I think the process of letting go of stuff teaches you what is most important in your life.. your family. Take care and thank you for dropping by!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. First you have great taste in what you did pick for your home. Wherever you land, you will always make the place beautiful and warm.
    I learned this after my divorce. I too wanted to wander in ways I was never able to due to raising three daughters. But I wandered by moving from one city to another every 2-21/2 years for the next ten years.
    I moved from a 3000 sq ft home to a 1100 in Santa Fe, NM. It was perfect and the furniture I did was enough.
    But I moved again to a smaller place-450 square feet. I have let go of so many things and reduced my self to the items that work in my space. Now I call it my jewel box. I moved again to Denver and to a slightly bigger place- a whopping 485 sq feet! I want a bigger place now-something with a small backyard for summer dinner parties. But I have found where ever I am- I make it beautiful and comfortable. People who visit are always amazed with the small place and yet the beauty and comfort it affords.
    I am settling now- for good I think in Denver.
    I hope your travels are meaningful and full of wonder!

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you for the well wishes. I’m looking forward to downsizing… can’t stand all the cleaning involved in a large house :). Thank you for dropping by and I hope you stay for the journey! Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: Letting Go of Home | Victoria Yeary·

  6. I stumbled upon your blog this morning. My husband and I will be relocating from California to Arizona with our young children in a few months. We currently live and own the home I was raised in all my life. My parents are both deceased and I feel completely attached to this house because it holds memories of some of my happiest times growing up. In some way, I feel connected to my parents here. The move is something we are so ready for and consider it a positive change in our lives, but letting go of this house terrifies me. So much so, we plan to rent it out before we sell. I hope one day I will be ok in letting it go. Thank you for your post. I came across it today for a reason.

    Liked by 4 people

    • I don’t have the time or memories collected as you have in yours, so I imagine it will be hard for you. But this letting go of stuff is very refreshing I have to admit. Like letting go of an old you to start anew. Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I understand. My home is filled with mementos of my childhood etc. I want to lead a more minimalist lifestyle, and what concerns me is why I have held so tightly to things that only remind me that my life was not particularly happy. Here’s to hoping one thing at a time, we both learn to let go.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Powerfully written. I’m gearing up for eventualities that will lead me to the opportunity for this life as well. My home is a trash heap compared to yours, but I’ll weep leaving the memories. The coffee table with digs in it from that night with the samurai sword, all the places my husband’s great grandfather cobbled something together to keep the house in working order, The rhubarb and Lilly of the Valley planted in the yard by Adam’s great grandmother…
    Needless to say, I think this is a wonderful blog and I look forward to following!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Beautifully written… And ur home is beautiful but health, peace of mind and warmth of your soul is more important… Think of it as this way.. The universe has given u an opportunity to do a make over and you are going to be fabulous after it…

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Lovely post, beautiful home … but you must do what you are supposed to do even if it hurts. I have sold two homes already in life. Its part of your life, we let go things which we though we never would. I changed country of stay 4 times! But there is no sorrow.. just I feel I successfully did it. When you look back you will always appreciate all the past.Unless you let go the things news things wont happen… So good luck! 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  11. You are very brave. I am such a homebody I could never do what you are planning. I have never been much of a traveler and am miserable away from my home environment. I wish you all the best with a nomadic existence.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yes this lifestyle is not for everyone, and until we actually do it, who knows if its for us. But we’ve had the desire so we took the risk. Thank for for the well wishes, they are much appreciated!

      Liked by 2 people

  12. I was captured by this post because it very much relates to my situation. However, you are very brave to have planned it. I went on a 2 week holiday to Thailand and failed to return, it has now been 3 years. I had a house, car, enjoyable job, motorbike, all at the age of 22, I was very lucky, however there was something so much more appealing about living out of a backpack. To this day, I still live out of my backpack and I rarely think about life before, the only thing I truly miss is family, no possessions at all.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Wow you really stripped your life bare – but I bet it was freeing! Now I’m thinking you’re pretty brave to make such a huge change without a plan. Congrats on following your dream and for dropping by!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Such a great and inspiring blog post. Real and honest. Thanks! Can’t wait to read more of your upcoming journey. Congratulations on being so brave in your decisions. Take care and I wish you and your family the best.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I don’t know if its bravery or foolhearted but we took the plunge! Thank you for the well wishes and I hope you stay for the ride! Thanks for dropping by!

      Like

  14. I really want to drop everything and move to Lisbon. I love the culture there, the vibe of the city and the people. But I’ll be leaving everything I know and I don’t know what I’ll do for a living if it go. I’m trying to plan every part of what’s going to happen but I think I’ll need to just dive in and see what happens and stop using them as excuses not to do it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • When I was in highschool I had a principle that told me I was a fence sitter. I’d want to keep the comfort of what I knew and just dabble my toes into whatever risk excited me without ever losing my touch on that comfort area. He told me that in life you have to take the risk and jump off the fence because not doing so doesn’t allow us to experience any experience for real. Plan as best you can, know there will be hiccups along the way and remember, if you don’t like what you jumped off the fence for, you can always jump back on! Take care and I hope you get to Lisbon!

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Thanks for this marvellous story. It is a real reminder that life is short and we need to do what gives us most pleasure. Keeping a house clean is not something that lifts the soul. Going on the road and making new discoveries will, by contrast, make you feel excited permanently. And when you want to have a family gathering you can always hire a house. When I sold my car years ago now I always said I could hire one if need be. Meanwhile I have been as free as a bird and that is what you are about to be. I look forward to following your journeys. I expect them to to be rich and engaging.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I can’t stand cleaning, another reason to unload a large house, lol!! But you are right. We’re trading things for experiences and should we need things again, we can always rent them! I hope you stay with us on our journey, I’m sure there is bound to be some entertainment along the way! 😜 Take care!

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  16. Thank you so much for this post. We are trying to downsize to try and live a simpler life but I have had problems letting go of “stuff”. You have given me the understanding and now the motivation to move on! You never know when we might have our paths cross !

    Liked by 1 person

    • I hope it helps you to let go of the “stuff” in your life. Besides when your life is full of happiness and love, who needs a bunch of stuff cluttering it all up. I hope our paths do cross! Take care and great name! 😉

      Like

  17. Enjoy your new surroundings … especially the ever-changing nature of them … and treasure the former the way one treasures childhood memories. Everything and everyplace we’ve been contributes to who we are, where we are in the moment. All One. Thank heaven we are not static!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I never thought of it that way, but you are right. Everything in my home and the home itself has contributed and therefore is a part of me. We will enjoy the new ever changing surroundings – especially the nature.

      Like

  18. I have to say that is a beautiful house, but I also have to say that you are so right about getting out there more…they are called the ‘trappings of wealth’ for a reason eh? It is so hard to let things go. Moving to NZ has led me to re-evaluate quite a bit of who I am and what I stand for, I guess only by changing your surroundings can you realise what is perhaps most important to you.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Changing our surroundings and removing clutter from our life… It allows you the opportunity to just be, and I kinda of like that idea. Take care and thanks for dropping by!

      Liked by 1 person

        • OMG!!!!! Yes Yes Yes!!! Sometimes we need to cut people out of our lives so we can focus on ourselves. I’m someone who will always put other’s first at my own expense. Doing this nomadic thing forces me to focus on myself and is another reason I am so looking forward to ti!

          Liked by 1 person

          • I think you do right. On a similar vein, I had a break from Facebook last year for a bit and realised how much of my time it wasted, I since decided I would only look at it rarely and unfriended people who I didn’t really care about…I was left with those who I was actually friends with…and strangely most of them don’t use Facebook much. Result, I can now do other stuff and go back to occasional messaging contact, which is so much more satisfying,

            Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you, it is a beautiful house but the best parts we’re taking with us. Good luck on your journey – I look forward to reading about your journeys as well!

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  19. I’m sure, that both of you will get lots of wonderful experiences with your new life style, Lily 🙂
    I needed to let much go, when I left Denmark to go to Spain to live, even if I brought a lot, I also left much. I brought the most important, my cats as an of course, they are my fur kids. The human kids are grown up and live their own lives.
    It was not easy just to leave the stuff, but I wished to travel and there are limits for, how much you bring to a new country. Here in Spain, I have been moving many times and I have left things all over or given away for people in need, when I didn’t have space in the new place. Today I don’t have so much left, but enough and I have plans to move to another country again, when I can afford so.
    I’m looking forward to follow your journey.

    Liked by 2 people

    • If you keep moving then the sacrifices must have been all worth it! That is what I am hoping and I’m sure they will be. We too will be bringing the essentials – dogs and equipment to stay connected with our family and kids. We’re at a good time in our lives where we’re still young enough to do the things we want but old enough that we have no other attachments to keep us tethered to one place. I’m glad you will be staying with us on our journey and I look forward to continue ogling over all your beautiful jewelry! Take care Irene!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you, Lily. Yes, I feel that the sacrifices have been worth it and I do also feel, that the less attached we become to things at all, the more we learn to live with the most necessary.
        I continue the style about giving away, when I see, that I have things, as I don’t use anyway. Why not make others happy to receive these things, what ever it is furniture, things or clothe.

        Liked by 1 person

  20. Beautifully said! A house is just that… just a building. It’s the memories we’ve created inside it that matter. It’s the people we share it with that matter. I must say, I’m envious of you. I would love to try the nomad lifestyle. Live in an RV instead of a house. Travel to wherever the RV can take us. Let the world be our classroom.

    Liked by 2 people

    • As much as I am looking forward to this new way of “living”, I must say it is a bit terrifying. There are so many unknowns that go along with this type of endevour you just couldn’t know everything that needs to be known. Having said that, you hit the nail on the head – we will wake up by them mountains, ocean or a Walmart parking lot if we so choose. We’ve traded our “stuff” for experiences and the ability to just continuously be on the move.

      Liked by 1 person

  21. We might not be nomads but we can fully understand. When we moved around the world for work, leaving behind our home was always heart wrenching. The memories, the things we have in there.. all out of reach when we are abroad

    Liked by 2 people

    • It is hard even to leave the walls which without us are nothing but a structure… its funny how much sentiment we place on physical things… Oh well, off to the next chapther of our lives and I’m sure to be an amazing adventure!

      Liked by 1 person

      • We are sure you will. And soon you will be sad to leave that place that now call new. We had homes in Shanghai and Amsterdam and till today we still miss them. In fact the one in Shanghai has already been pulled down and redeveloped!

        Liked by 1 person

  22. We’re slowly getting rid of possessions in preparation for the day I we can sell up and travel. It’ll be a few years away yet, but we want to do it while we still have our health and are able.
    I think mentally it’ll be easier to slowly clear out dvds/cd’s etc than if we just suddenly decided and dumped everything. Hope you have a great time.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I wish we had of had more time to disconnect but considering the circumstances we just had to bite the bullet so to speak. Take care and I wish you well on your journey whenever it may begin!

      Liked by 1 person

  23. Really nice house. As I read this, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros were singing home “is wherever I’m with you.” Be that in the beautiful house or on the road, it’s where you and Q follow your dreams.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Beautifullly written. I know you and Q will have a great journey and you take with you all the love of your family. All my love xxxx

    Liked by 2 people

    • I’m guessing this was posted by my mother. If not, then yes we will have the love of all our family with us…. and hopefully a couple of visitors from time to time so we don’t feel too isolated for the rest of the pack while on our journeys. XOXOXO love you Mom 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  25. Having just closed on our own home in the last month, I can totally relate to what you’re going through. I get sentimentally attached to things as well, and often struggled when it came time to let them go, but our house was the hardest. It was where we raised our children after all.
    Like you, I finally came to the realization that it was the memories I was attached to, not the specific objects. And those memories take up no space at all while traveling, thank goodness. Keeping that in mind, I find it much easier to move on now.

    Liked by 3 people

    • I had to shift my thinking from “I was losing my home” to “I was letting my home go”. That helped me alot, to disconnect. Nice to find someone else who is experiencing the same highs and lows as us. As much as you want to move forward with a dream, doesn’t mean it’s easy letting go the things you loved about your life but just don’t fit into the new schematic. I hope you continue to join us on our journey. Would be nice to compare notes from time to tiime. Take care and thanks for dropping by!

      Like

      • I am thankful you shared this viewpoint- that you chose to let it go- I left my home to move across the country almost a year ago and still am feeling a sense of loss. My things came with me and I moved to be with my partner. I don’t regret my decision, but it doesn’t negate the leaving and loss. I find it very similar to a grieving process, honestly.

        I am working (and continually searching for inspiration) toward embracing our new home so I appreciate your post 🙂

        Like

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